Oh, you crafty devil, you

John McCain tapped Alaska governor-minx Sarah Palin for his VP slot, and GWS's snark gland is raging out of control. A curious choice, but a decent political move, Palin offers America a chance to put a really attractive woman just one bullet from The Button.


Tell me you wouldn't hit that.

D'oh!

Sen. Joe Biden represents, as many of you know, the great state of Delaware, not Maryland, as GWS reported Saturday. DBMIVFK regrets the error.

He has to win now, right?

GWS's favorite senior Senator from Maryland was tapped for the Democratic vice-presidential nomination. The term "experience" gets thrown around far too much, but Joe Biden's long tenure on the Foreign Relations Committee ought to balance out the intricate decision-making involved in parachuting over North Vietnam and deliver the White House for the Dems. Biden's performance in the Democratic debates had GWS swooning, and even geniuses like David Brooks think he's the man for the job.

Obama has to win now. He's got the white-haired foreign policy maven behind him, and Biden's old Dem credentials should carry Obama through the Rust Belt.

We hope.

So say we all.

I hate Maureen Dowd

This column is routinely the "most e-mailed" article on the Times website.

Are you fucking kidding me? She reads like a sarcastic 6th-grader. Her column is the least informative, least mature, and by far most insulting to readers' intelligence (and I'm including Bill Kristol).

Ugh.

McKain Komedy Klassics!

Quick, what did the coolee say to the mick?

John McCain might know the answer ("Fly lice, pree-zuh," for those keeping score at home).

So, what, we're supposed to be shocked that John McCain tells off color jokes and has for decades? Big deal. The man is seven years younger than GWS's grandfather, who still refers to black people as colored. He doesn't mean it as a slur---heck, he really likes the way that young colored fellow at Jefferson High runs the floor and shoots the 3. But he's (say it with me now) old.

And if the crack about Alzheimer's meaning you get to hide your own Easter eggs didn't make you chuckle, then you, sir, are dead on the inside.

The death of Kelly Bundy

Christina Applegate, pictured here as seminal nymphet Kelly Bundy and currently playing some role on some show GWS has never seen, is now cancer free after a double mastectomy.
















...is it too soon for a No Ma'am joke?

Autotext FAIL

It seems that Christian media outlet OneNewsNow has a problem with being Gay.

Olympic sprinter/100m choke-artist Tyson Gay, that is.

Did someone do a study finding that "homosexual" connotes a wholly different image than "gay"? If so, GWS would love to see it, because otherwise, this just doesn't make any sense to DBMIVFK.

Furthermore, these must be the most self-assuredly straight Christians in history---they're so straight, they don't even exhibit an abnormal hangup about the word gay! QED.

In an unrelated story, the National Air and Space Museum has replaced the plaque in front of the B-29 Superfortress that dropped the first atomic bomb on Hiroshima. The Enola Homosexual was, in fact, named for the pilot's mother, Enola Homosexual, not for anyone practicing the sort of lifestyle so vigorously condemned by the Lord in Leviticus.